These Are A Few Of My Favorite Things

Outside of the obvious things - friends and family and all of our loved ones - we all have things that can cheer us up or make us happy or give us those warm fuzzies no matter what. Here are just a few of mine.

Memes
Man, I love memes. I have a bunch of them saved to my phone and regularly use them in text conversations. Seriously, if you're feeling irritated or bummed out, just google 'funny meme' and you'll be giggling in no time. They're simple and silly, but effective. Here are some of my favorites and/or most oft used.

And here are my Top 3 Favorite Memes Of All Time, because they just make me laugh and laugh no matter what. Seriously, just imagine these things really happening, and try to think about what situations you would be in where these are applicable:

Beyonce
If you asked me how many solo dance parties I have had while cleaning my house blasting Beyonce music, I don't think I would be able to tell you. I lost track a long time ago. At our wedding, our first dance was to her version of Ave Maria. Last week I told Clinton that if I could switch places with anyone in the world for one day it would be Beyonce. Why, you ask? BECAUSE SHE IS BE-FREAKING-YONCE. She's an international superstar at the top of her game, she's absolutely gorgeous, she is rich beyond my wildest imagination, she is friends with the POTUS for goodness sake (!!!), and oh yeah by the way if none of that is enough she is married to HOVA!!! I'm fine being myself and all, but seriously.

Cloudy/rainy/dreary days
Growing up in the desert can be rough. I've lived in different areas where there are seasons and it snows, but most of my life has been spent in one of the hottest, driest places around and let me tell you, it gets old quick. I've never been a fan of the desert, for as long as I can remember. I am cognizant enough to realize that there is real beauty here, but for myself, I just greatly prefer places with snow and rain and NOT 115F degrees. Because of this, there is nearly nothing that I love more than rainy days. Even if it's just cloudy, I still appreciate that because it's rare here and I have always, always loved everything about rain. I love thunder and lightning, I love the way the clouds look, I love the way the air feels, I love how everything looks green, and I LOVE the way the desert smells after the rain. Whenever it rains here I always wind up taking a bunch of pictures because looking at them makes me happy.

Raindrops on my windshield.

Cool clouds during a walk around my apartment complex.

One of my all-time favorite memories is from a day trip Clinton and I took last year - we took our puppy Emmy and drove up to Montezuma Castle, walked around and checked it out, and then decided to go picnic at Montezuma Well down the road. When we got there the clouds had gotten pretty dark and ominous, but there was no lightning yet so we decided to push on. We hiked around there a bit for awhile checking out the well and then taking some old stairs carved in the stone down to a creek and we even saw some hippie-type people having some kind of ritual down there with smoke pipes and singing a pretty song.



Emmy on some rocks down by the creek.

 It started to sprinkle and then rain a bit heavier, so we went back to our car and decided to wait out the storm instead of trying to drive in it. We sat in the back of our little SUV with the hatch up and ate the most amazing picnic of good quality cheese, nuts, veggies, hummus, and chocolate pudding. Emmy sat between us eating a couple biscuits and even got lucky enough to be handed a few slivers of cheese. The rain came down in sheets and gales and the wind shook our car, but we just lay there in the back dry and comfortable and warm watching it for an hour. It was amazing, and the photo I took is still the background on my phone because it brings back such a good memory.

Comfort Foods
Mine are red velvet cake, avocados, and orange juice. These are my absolute favorite foods - I basically never turn down the cake or guacamole. Orange juice and I have a long history. Ever since I was little, it's the thing I wanted if I was sad. Sometimes if I'm bummed and we don't have any juice, Clinton will go out and get me some. When we lived in different cities and I'd go visit my best friend, she would always make sure she had OJ for my visits. It's not just something I want when I'm sad, but it does always seem to help a little bit.

OMNOMNOM GET IN MY BELLY.

Delicious AND nutritious!

Most of the time now, I just make my own! This week's batch had a grapefruit too.

Photographs
 I love pictures. Take a look back at my entries and it should be pretty obvious - they are littered with photos breaking up the text. I love them so much that my dad even brought it up in his speech at my wedding - he said that he was thankful that I always take and keep old pictures because it has helped him re-live and remember some stuff - for awhile my Facebook cover photo was a picture of my dad walking behind me, teaching me how to ride my bike, and he mentioned that one specifically in his speech. He was right though - I get to remember some amazing things and re-live some great days just by looking through old photos. Those images can be an incredibly powerful thing and take you right back to a place you may have thought that you had forgotten. I'm a big fan of Instagram because it is JUST pictures. My phone saves all my Instagram photos to memory and I like looking back through them sometimes because I can remember where I was, what I was doing, and who I was with in all of them, just from a small 1.5"x1.5" image.

I love looking at other people's old pictures too - imagining what things were like, where the were, what it smelled like, how they felt. I love looking at pictures that people show me of their recent vacations. I even love looking through magazines - food magazines, style, decor - I just love the vivid imagery, it makes me happy.

When the dog bites
When the bee stings
When I'm feeling sad
I simply remember my favorite things
And then I don't feel so bad

What are a few of your favorite things? I'd love to hear about them.

Not Your Typical February 14th

Every year, it's the same thing. People ask me what I am doing for Valentine's Day. Every year, I say nothing. Every year, they ask why. Every year, the answer is the same: because I do not like Valentine's Day. I'd be happy to leave it at that, but every year, people push. "Oh so you don't like love?" Yeah, that's obviously it. Obviously I do not approve of love or celebrating said love. Obviously. My relationship and recent public declaration (wedding, hello?) and celebration of love obviously show the world how much I hate love. OBVIOUSLY.



Boy, don't we just look miserable? Love is the worst!

 I'm just not interested in Valentine's Day, or being someone's Valentine. I never have been. I just really don't like being told that I have to partipate in something to prove my love for someone. Usually when I talk about this people rebuttal with oh, but every single other holiday is the same and you celebrate them. But it's not. They're not. Sure, you're expected to get people presents on Christmas and every other national holiday is consumer-driven. I get it. My main problem is that Valentine's Day, the day that's supposed to celebrate love and intimacy, is the most impersonal day of the year. For the majority, there is ZERO thought put into it. It is just too easy, and not special at all. Every store I go is an assault to the eyes and looks like Google images threw up a Valentine's Day search everywhere.

 Unless you live under a rock, I'm sure you've been grocery shopping this month - this is the worst. Balloons and chocolate and teddy bears everywhere in the store and honestly, I can even force myself to stomach that, but what REALLY gets me is those big white tents set up outside in the corner of every grocery store parking lot filled with half dead flowers and huge cheap teddy bears that fall apart if you look at them too hard. PLEASE explain to me how this is special. "Oh hey I just picked up some milk and toilet paper, now let me grab this sweatshop teddy bear that has been sitting outside all day, boy my wife sure is lucky that I am so romantic!" COME ON.



Oh wow, you must have put so much thought into which balloon to get!

 It's just so forced. I like that my husband and I get each other random gifts throughout the year and express our love and go on romantic dates whenever the mood strikes. I would not like it if it was done out of obligation because it would not be nearly as special or sincere. A friend of mine is upset that today is Valentine's day because her and her partner have been fighting, and she feels like she has to be all mushy and lovey today regardless of that. Yeah, sorry, but no. Just doesn't do it for me.

Here's what I'm doing tonight - my husband and I are going to a high school basketball finals game because his friend is the coach. And it will be a lot more fun than sitting in a restaurant decorated in pink with a whole bunch of other people who are there because they have to be. If that makes me a scrooge then I don't mind, I'm cool with it. I'll still love my husband just as much tomorrow though.

Here are some things that I would rather do than celebrate Valentine's Day:

Eat all of these green bell peppers...

... and this entire strawberry rhubarb pie.

Watch 10 episodes of Spongebob Squarepants back to back.

Listen to nothing but death metal for a week straight.

Stub my toe in the middle of the night.

Fall down some stairs.

Be put in an armbar.

Get stung in the eye by a bee.

Instead of doing any of those unpleaseant things however, I will just rant on the internet. That's what the internet is for, right? Deifnitely yes. Also, over at The Oatmeal there's a funny post about assholes like me who can't get past how stupid Valentine's Day is, so I definitely recommend checking that out right here.

My favorite panel from the V-Day post.

Oh, but there is at least one good thing about today - if anyone has any candy hearts they are looking to get rid of, I will eat the shit out of those things. But only the white ones. Because they are delicious.

By the way, there's a slight chance that this post was brought on by the fact that I accidentally wore a pink sweater today. NO, RANDOM COWORKER, IT IS NOT FESTIVE. I WEAR THIS SWEATER AT LEAST ONCE A WEEK. THANK YOU.

/rant

Bucket List.

Everyone has a bucket list, right? Even if they don't call it that or have it written down, everyone has stuff they want to do before they die. This post is about something on mine.

I don't know how I only discovered this recently since they have been my favorite animal for as long as I have known of their existence, but I found out about a month ago that you can swim with manatees in Florida. Lord have mercy. The thought alone makes me so happy that I could cry.

I want to go to there.

Manatees are literally the most perfect creatures on the planet and I want to hug them all of the time. They're mainly herbivores, so they're automatically sweeter than predators. According to Wikipedia, "adults have no incisor or canine teeth, just a set of cheek teeth ... At any given time, a manatee typically has no more than six teeth in each jaw of its mouth." See! They couldn't hurt you if they tried. Precious ocean lettuce eaters with only twelve teeth, and they don't even have any sharp ones. Adorable. They have a long term memory and when the females have calves, they barely leave each other's side for up to 2 years.

So speaking of the sweet, loving, mama manatee, I would like to introduce you to my favorite meme of all time: The Calming Manatee. Do yourself a favor - dowload all of these photos to your phone and whenever a friend is having a bad day, send them one. You can't be upset! Mama manatee will comfort you with her deep, slow voice and her big mama manatee hugs.

Try to be upset when you're looking at these. Just try it. I dare ya.

JUST LOOK AT THEM! They just want you to be happy, even though they have been through so much. The reason I love manatees so much is because they get kind of a raw deal. These poor guys are called sea cows, and I hate that because cows are common, dull creatures and manatees are beautiful and kind and in constant danger. The majority of manatee deaths are caused by humans. They swim in warm, shallow water and they can only hear high frequencies, so the low frequencies of most boats confuse them and these poor harmless creatures are regularly mutilated. It's not uncommon to see manatees with huge gashes on their backs from boat propellers. So sad. All they wanted to do was eat some seaweed.

The first time I saw a manatee I thought it was so ugly that it was cute. The ugliest, and therefore the cutest thing I'd ever seen. I remember discovering them at SeaWorld and waiting the whole day to spend any of my allowance in the various shops until we went back to the manatee habitat at the end of the day and I bought a necklace and a cup. I lost the cup, but I still have the necklace, and I have never stopped loving them. If anything, I love them more. A few years ago I went to SeaWorld with my husband and I was SO excited to see the manatee habitat. I was sick that day and feeling pretty crappy by the end of the day. We had avoided that area of the park the whole day so that we could save it for last and when we got there, we were told that they had been moved to a new location a few months earlier. Devastated doesn't cover how I felt. Luckily, I had these guys to get me through the heartache:

And just when you think it can't get any cuter, here you go, let me show you the cutest thing you will lay eyes on today. BABY MANATEES.

Don't worry scared baby, I'll hold you.

Losing your mama must be rough, but I'll take care of you, Baby Manatee.

CUTEST THING OF MY LIFE!

Come on. Just... come on. I want to squeeze them because there is no animal on earth more adorable than a baby manatee. NONE. When I found that last picture I showed it to my husband and told him that I need one or I will die. He said I might be exaggerating. I don't know what he's talking about, I've never exaggerated a day in my life.

Even science thinks that manatees are awesome. Here, I will prove it.

This is science.

You know what, even when they're being really really dumb, they're still cute:
http://cheezburger.com/6091301632

THAT IS THE CUTEST GIF OF ALL TIME. I obviously have seen every gif ever invented ever and so I can say with absolutely certainty that this is the best one of them all. Don't even try to question it, you'll hurt yourself. But don't worry - if you do hurt yourself, Calming Manatee will be there to help.

So now you know a tiny part of the reason why swimming with manatees is on my bucket list. It's achievable, because you can do it in Florida and I need to go to Florida anyway for my other obsession, so obviously this trip will be happening someday - hopefully soon. Don't expect the pictures to be pretty though, because I will probably have a Kristen-Bell-meets-a-sloth moment when I am finally up close and personal with one of these precious creatures. I CAN'T WAIT.